Aimless
by cacy11
Summary: Wheatley, Rick and the Space Core float across the mining ship Red Dwarf and are brought aboard by the crew. Set after Portal 2 and Red Dwarf series 10.


**Aimless**

 **A/N: Thanks for taking your time to read this! I'm quite surprised that there are no Red Dwarf/Portal crossovers yet, but oh well. There are no ships in this. There will be the odd swear word, but I'll try to keep swearing to a minimum. This will be set on Red Dwarf, after series 9 and 10 and after the ending of Portal 2. No Holly or GLaDOS, sorry. But hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Wheatley, Rick and the Space Core floated in the dark reaches of space. Wheatley closed his blue optic, trying to block out the endless ramblings of the Space Core. Rick had given up ever expecting something exciting happening to them.

"Space! So big! Need to see more! Planets, stars, asteroids!" babbled the Space Core, his yellow optic flicking around quickly, trying to take in the excitement of space. Rick rolled his dark green optic, and looked behind him. Nothing. Wheatley head had just about enough of the Space Core's voice now.

"SHUT UP!" He yelled, resulting in a few seconds of silence, but no more, from the Core who Wheatley assumed completely defective by now

"Face it," said Rick "He's never going to shut up. The end."

"I'm so tired of hearing the same crap _again and again and again_!" He complained. Wheatley's mood suddenly changed after he thought about it and he sighed "If only I had just tried reasoning with her rather than just taking over... I couldn't even let that test subject go. I was so selfish!"

A deep rumble started sounding, barely audible. Making even the Space Core turn to look. Nothing was visible, but the sound had grown slightly louder.

"Oh! Oh! Spaceship!" Said space Core, letting out exited gasps

"Maybe it's rouge star!" said Rick, building a false hope of danger

"Get real, you two! What are the chances of eithe-" His optic shrunk dramatically, and Space Core had once again quietened to gasps. A tiny crimson hexagon was now visible, and it was slowly getting bigger, and details could be seen. It was a strange shape, but it was definitely a spaceship.

"Spaceship!" gasped Space Core

"Oh, wow..." was all Wheatley could say. They were safe.

* * *

Rimmer was pacing his sleeping quarters, when Kryten ran in. Lister got down from his bunk, and Rimmer stopped pacing and looked up.

"Sirs! The scouters have picked up something amazing!" He exclaimed

"Cleaning supplies?" Asked Rimmer, irritated

"Rimmer, c'mon!" Said Lister, following Kryten out of the room. Rimmer shook his head, sighed and walked out behind them. Cat was already waiting for them in the drive room, lent over the console. Lister walked up next to him. Kryten clicked up the image and zoomed in as far as possible. Three metal spheres were floating toward them slowly. They all had something that looked like an eye. One of them had an eye consisting of three shades of blue, another had a dark green eye with a darker green rectangle that seemed to be a pupil. The last one had a yellow eye that was a circle of dashes that quickly changed in size.

"What the smeg are they?" asked Lister, squinting

"Aliens!" Exclaimed Rimmer, receiving an eye rolling from Lister and a head shake from Cat

"Should we bring them aboard sirs?" asked Kryten

"Yes!" Insisted Rimmer

"Sure," said Lister. Kryten lead the way to Starbug to retrieve the three UOs. Rimmer wore a determined expression, but his T-count was quite high. He was a coward, and he had a small thought tugging at his mind that the UOs were hostile and would somehow attack them. He knew that it was unlikely that they could even attack them, and he was internally boasting that he was already dead, so it would b even more difficult to kill him.

* * *

Wheatley looked at the small green craft that flew out of the big crimson ship. They had been seen and no doubt were going to be picked up. The Space Core was babbling about astronauts and Rick was trying to make dramatic music, failing badly.

"If I could smile, that's what I'd be doing now," sighed Wheatley.

* * *

 **A/N: I hope you liked this first chapter! I'd be happy for a review, and I am planning to add some danger in. If you like this enough, then I'll add another chapter. Thanks for reading!**


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